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Blessing Forward - December 2004

Something has broken free inside of me this fall. My girls have left home, gone to college - following the path that is their dharma and leaving me to mine. Their leaving has opened a space inside that thirsts for experience. Self-exploration evaded me in my 20’s, but now at 45, I’m ready to step into it fully and feel life on my own terms. I began to play in August with ballroom dancing and tennis (I admit, I had to coax Peter more into the dancing than the tennis). I was having so much fun, that I decided to sign up for singing lessons. Or, what I thought was singing lessons . . .

In yoga, we talk about the formal practice on the mat; breathe, stretch, meditate. But, really the formal practice is in preparation for the informal practice, which is life, happening every moment of every day. Formal practice requires a willingness to empty yourself of expectation; to be authentically present with what is – here and now. There’s an aliveness to the feeling of presence that we miss when we’re chasing down dreams of the future or churning over past disappointments. Our practice teaches us to fully embrace whatever life presents us, with equanimity and when necessary, with humor.

So, when I discovered that my ’singing lessons’ were intended to culminate in a solo performance held at Benaroya Hall, it was the years of formal practice that kept me from hightailing it out of the room. Every week for six consecutive weeks, I sang my way into Seattle for class, practicing ’my song’, incredulous that I was going through with this seemingly surreal folly. Our teacher didn’t actually require that we perform, only that we ’pretend’ to perform, up until the very last moment. Each session I was bolstered by the tender courage of my classmates, most of who, like me, had never dreamed of singing alone. We pretended together so well, that we made ourselves into a believable little band of singers, much to the delight of our closest family and friends.

I can’t describe the amazing grace that occurred the night of the concert (although with my new found voice, I could possibly sing it to you). I can only say that it was a peak experience, an experience of pure joy. We stepped through our self-imposed barriers (“I’m tone-deaf. I won’t hit the high notes. I’ll embarrass myself.”) and claimed our God-given instrument: the Voice. Our willingness to be vulnerable, alternately terrified and exhilarated empowered us. In the moment of the song, there was no where else to be, but present.

From song to travel, the adventure continues. This week my husband I leave for Israel on a Spiritual Retreat. Many people look concerned when I tell them of our plans. The land there has survived a millennium of conflict and strife. I don’t know that the chaos there is really much different than the chaos here. I only know that I’m open to experience whatever will be, to greet each day fresh, curious to explore.

I recently heard of a beautiful concept called: “Blessing Forward,” in so much as we can never predict the outcome of any circumstance, we can certainly send blessings ahead to light the path. With that intention, I send you blessings forward and ask for you to send them my way in return. I encourage you to practice everyday: practice stillness, or singing out loud, dancing on your toes, standing on your head, or watching the birds circle in the sky. Just open to the moment, feel the aliveness of NOW – and bless. May the New Year bring us all closer to peace . . .

Blessings,

The Yoga Barn, Inc.
Robin Rothenberg, Certified Yoga Instructor
660 NW Gilman Blvd., Suite C6, Issaquah, WA  98027
Studios located in both Issaquah and Fall City
Phone: 425.427.0038  -  Fax: 425.427.0613
E-mail: info@yogabarn.com  -  Web: www.yogabarn.com

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